...like a spider monkey

“Let your plans be dark and as impenetratable as night, and when you move, fall like a thunderbolt.”—Sun Tzu

In sports, business, and daily life, conflict is something that comes up whether you want it to or not. It’s when and how you handle those situations that define you.

I recently was put into a situation where someone was slandering my character and business savvy to my wife. MY WIFE?!! I know what you are thinking...ATTACK! But, having been a former surgical patient for a broken hand from doing just that...I decided to listen to the whole story first. The key to listening to these types of "stories" is to listen without emotion and only focus on the facts. After you have listened, analyzed the situation, and then let it "stew" for a while. You will be able to take a more objective perspective on the situation after thinking it through. So… I did just that. It turns out their wasn’t a situation at all…or so I thought…
…Three days pass and the situation happens again with a similar story and a similar confrontation. The only difference…it was ROUND TWO!

So what do you do in this situation? How do you react? How do you know when to protect your name and when you should just take a deep breath and keep your eye on the prize? The following list of questions will help you determine whether or not you need to attack like a spider monkey:

1. Is it worth losing my job/credibility over
2. Did the person slander my name/character
3. Did the person hurt me emotionally, financially, or physically
4. Is my personal progress affected in my company/community
5. Have I tried alternative avenues for resolving these problems

If you answer "Yes" to all 5 questions (which I did), then you know its ON LIKE DONKEY KONG. If not, take a deep breath and keep your eye on the prize.
Understand that conflict is a part of life and those that can manage it and make it work for them will be the ones standing at the end…